


There's Nothing Left to Say

by SeptemberSilver



Series: Calliope/Caliborn [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, F/M, I am so sorry, I feel like I need more tags, I promised myself I'd never write one but I guess I was wrong, Romance, Songfic, Stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-14
Updated: 2013-08-14
Packaged: 2017-12-23 10:48:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/925480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeptemberSilver/pseuds/SeptemberSilver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A songfic, but hopefully not stupidly so.</p>
            </blockquote>





	There's Nothing Left to Say

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, so this is not exactly set in a canon environment. This is assuming that after Caliborn kills Calliope, he stays in his room for a little longer (WITH HIS LEG) before starting the game. Enjoy!
> 
> The song is Nothing Left to Say by Imagine Dragons.

 

There was nothing but endless space.

 

She could do nothing but stand in the middle of the Furthest Ring. Alone.

 

She had nobody to talk to. That was normal, but at least she had her computer back then.

 

Caliborn was gone. Part of her was missing. She never fell asleep, no matter how hard she tried—how could she?

**_Who knows how long I've been awake now?_ **

**_The shadows on my wall don't sleep_ **

**_They keep calling me_ **

**_Beckoning..._ **

 

She had panic attacks sometimes. She kept imagining her brother standing there, angry, tormented. She always saw him. Always.

 

**_Who knows what's right?_ **

**_The lines keep getting thinner_ **

**_My age has never made me wise_ **

**_But I keep pushing on and on and on and on_ **

She thought about him over and over until she had fits of hysteria, screaming and crying and turning round and round, looking for some way out, looking for anything, anything at all.

 

Looking for a way home.

 

But there wasn’t one, she knew.

 

There was nothing but emptiness. Emptiness around her and in her heart.

 

**_There's nothing left to say now..._ **

**_I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now_ **

**_There's nothing left to say now…_ **

**_I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now..._ **

 

Caliborn stumbled out of his Sarswapagus every night half mad, and tonight was no different.

 

Sweat dripped off his face and onto the floor as he collapsed onto his knees. He thought of his sister often—his eyes were full of tears that he refused to let spill, and his hands were full of his own semen.

**_Below my soul_ **

**_I feel an engine_ **

**_Collapsing as it sees the pain_ **

**_If I could only shut it out_ **

 

“GO. AWAY,” he said to the pain, to thoughts of his sister. “LEAVE ME ALONE.”

 

_She is dead and it’s allyourfaultyoustupidbitchwhydidyoudie WHY DID YOU FUCKING DIE? WHY COULDN’T YOU STAND UP TO ME? WHY. CAN’T. YOU. SEE. I. NEED. YOU? I NEED YOU. TO KEEP ME. SEMI-SANE._

His head spun. He was dizzy. He told himself, like he always does, that this will pass, that he’s strong enough to do anything, but he knows in his heart he _doesn’t_ believe it and it _won’t_ get better.

 

But he _had_ to play the fucking game. He couldn’t turn back.

 

He knew if he stayed in that room forever it would kill him.

 

**_I've come too far_ **

**_To see the end now_ **

**_Even if my way is wrong_ **

**_I keep pushing on and on and on and on_ **

He’s slowly dying, dying, dying on the inside. His head is full of pain, emotional and physical. He doesn’t sleep either. He just lies awake, because the more he closes his eyes the more he sees his sister.

 

He misses her. He cannot admit it, and yet he does.

 

**_There's nothing left to say now..._ **

**_I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now_ **

**_There's nothing left to say now…_ **

**_I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now..._ **

 

There is nothing to live for. She’s dead, but she’s conscious, and she’s not even allowed to float through dream bubbles.

 

She prays that something would happen, that somehow she’d find her way to him.

 

Or that he cares enough to find his way to her.

 

_THERE'S NO WAY OUT, I’M STUCK HERE FOREVER. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? HOW HARD AM I SUPPOSED TO TRY? Wasn’t my life meant to be meaningful? I thought I was special. HAH. I thought one day, some day, I could be loved, and I could love somebody._

_The second part came true. But only after he killed me._

**_I keep falling, I keep falling down..._ **

**_I keep falling, I keep falling down..._ **

**_I keep falling, I keep falling down..._ **

**_I keep falling, I keep falling down..._ **

Caliborn paced around the room. There had to be _some_ way to get these thoughts out of his head, there had to be something to _TAKE. AWAY. THE PAIN. BEFORE IT KILLS ME._

_MORE THAN IT ALREADY HAS._

 

**_If you could only save me_ **

**_I'm drowning in the waters of my soul_ **

He leant down to his leg and bit.

 

It was painful. _BEAUTIFUL._ All his thoughts went to the pain in his legs, and he bit harder and harder, bit with all the anger towards himself and his sister and the whole world.

 

And he tore his own leg off, filling his mouth with the taste of his blood.

**_There's nothing left to say now..._ **

**_I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now_ **

**_There's nothing left to say now…_ **

**_I'm giving up, giving up, hey hey, giving up now..._ **

 

He smiled. Triumphant. Strong.

 

He would play the fucking game. He would win it. And then he’d find some way back to her. 


End file.
